Not Alive

Here's a poem from October 5, 2008, I found in one of my old notebooks that I wanted to share.  I'm not in that same state but feeling a little "numb" as the poem mentions.

I feel numb at the moment;
I alive but not living.
I cannot know what true happiness is
Because it's not present.


Take away the coldness in my heart,
The hurt and angst and pain.
Take all the memories
That cause my heart to bleed everyday.


I do not know what I live for
As I go through each day mondane.
The viciousness tears at my soul and heart
To never be fully joyful again.


Life will slowly go on
As it does everyday,
But there will always be a sadness to my heart
That will never go away.